Herman Melville Quote

"It is impossible to talk or to write without apparently throwing oneself helplessly open."
~Herman Melville

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

U.S. Tennis Ump Serves Husband Overhead Smash for Breakfast


        70-year-old tennis referee, Lois Ann Goodman, was arrested for murder today in New York City, where she was supposed to officiate the U.S. Open.  Back in April, Goodman called Los Angeles police and reported that she had found her 80-year-old husband dead at the bottom of the stairs; she told them that she guessed he had had a heart attack and fallen.  Earlier this month, Alan Goodman's death was ruled a homicide; the cause of death being multiple injuries to the head.  The murder weapon?  According to the arrest warrant, it was a coffee cup.
        If convicted, Goodman faces life in state prison.  LAPD detectives say they know the motive but report that sharing it with the public may affect the case.  If Lois Ann Goodman is anything like me in the morning, the motive could have been something as simple as irritation that her husband was taking too long in the bathroom.  I think she should plead temporary insanity - I don't think anyone should be held responsible for anything they do or say before 9am.  I feel for this woman; I have definitely been guilty of homicidal thoughts in the morning, hell - this morning I considered killing someone.  I can picture her standing at the counter, mug in hand, waiting for those last little irritating drops of coffee to finish coming through the filter.  Her husband was probably complaining about something - the dry-cleaners messed up the crease in his pants again - whatever - and she just snapped.  I completely understand.  I think I'm going to have "Free Lois Goldman" T-shirts made and sell them to help raise her bail.    

1 comment:

  1. Shann - I will buy said shirt! If we could get in trouble for homicidal thoughts, I'd be serving 25-life. Lois just did what we've all wanted to do to fellas when we get pestered in any capacity before our coffee! ;)

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